What’s good, y’all? I decided to pop in and get some stuff off my chest…

This whole “pregnant man” thing bothers me to no end. I am not being judgemental, because I feel that people should do and be with whoever makes them happy…but why label him as a “pregnant man?” I know he took hormones, had surgeries, but he kept his female organs so he could carry a child…doesn’t that still make him a female? I guess I just have a problem with the label…

What the hell is wrong with Shaq? I love Shaq…have loved him since he came out of Louisiana State University and was drafted to Orlando. Loved him when he went to Los Angeles and took his side during all of that Kobe shit…and when he went to Miami, hated Kobe because he seemed to. But now? It seems as though he can’t let shit go. I know Shaq has a good heart (don’t ask me how I know…I just know) and I know that he is a good person, but like Stephen A. Smith said this morning, he is in jeopardy of damaging his legacy with this bullshit if he doesn’t bury it. Why does he feel the need to keep bringing it up? I know that when you feel like you’ve been wronged, it’s hard to ignore it. But dude…it’s been years! Shaq, baby…throw that shit away!

LeBron on the other hand says that he’s not ruling out leaving Cleveland after his contract expires. I hope that he doesn’t, and my feelings would be a little mixed if he did. I mean, on one hand, loyalty only gets you so far (Kevin Garnett)…on the other hand, Cleveland is his home…bump that. Bron, go get you a ring, baby! You deserve it! If they can’t bring it to you, you must go and find it.

Huge fail…

video credit: originally uploaded to YouTube on October 2, 2008 by failblog

Talk to y’all later!

I found this on the ‘net…what do you see when you look out the window?

There were once two men, both seriously ill, in the same small room of a great hospital. Quite a small room, just large enough for the pair of them - two beds, two bedside lockers, a door opening on the hall, and one window looking out on the world.

One of the men, as part of his treatment, was allowed to sit up in bed for an hour in the afternoon, (something that had to do with draining the fluid from his lungs) and his bed was next to the window.

But the other man had to spend all his time flat on his back - and both of them had to be kept quiet and still. Which was the reason they were in the small room by themselves, and they were grateful for peace and privacy - none of the bustle and clatter and prying eyes of the general ward for them.

Of course, one of the disadvantages of their condition was that they weren’t allowed much to do: no reading, no radio, certainly no television - they just had to keep quiet and still, just the two of them.

They used to talk for hours and hours - about their wives, their children, their homes their former jobs, their hobbies, their childhood, what they did during the war, where they had been on vacations - all that sort of thing. Every afternoon, when the man in the bed next to the window was propped up for his hour, he would pass the time by describing what he could see outside. And the other man began to live for those hours.

The window apparently overlooked a park with a lake where there were ducks and swans, children throwing them bread and sailing model boats, and young lovers walking hand in hand beneath the trees. And there were flowers and stretches of grass and games of softball, people taking their ease in the sunshine, and right at the back, behind the fringe of the tress, a fine view of the city skyline.

The man on his back would listen to all of this, enjoying every minute how a child nearly fell into the lake, how beautiful the girls were in their summer dresses, and then an exciting ball game, or a boy playing with his puppy. It got to the place that he could almost see what was happening outside.

Then one fine afternoon, when there was some sort of parade, the thought struck him: Why should the man next to the window have all the pleasure of seeing what was going on? Why shouldn’t he get the chance?

He felt ashamed and tried not to think like that, but the more he tried, the worse he wanted to change. He’d do anything!

In a few days he had turned sour. He should be by the window. And he brooded and couldn’t sleep, and grew even more seriously ill - which none of the doctors understood.

One night, as he stared at the ceiling, the other man (the man next to the window) suddenly woke up coughing and choking, the fluid congesting in his lungs, his hands groping for the button that would bring the night nurse running. But the man continued to stare at the ceiling.

In the morning, the day nurse came in with water for their baths and found the other man dead. They took away his body, quietly, no fuss.

As soon as it seemed decent, the man asked if he could be moved to the bed next to the window. And they moved him, tucked him in, and made him quite comfortable, and left him alone to be quiet and still.

The minute they’d gone, he propped himself up on one elbow, painfully and labouriously, and looked out the window. It faced a blank wall.

~ Taken from “Growing Deep - Exploring the Roots of Our Faith”, by Charles R. Swindoll.

Good evening, people! It’s Saturday and that means it is time for The10Spot!

Let’s get it on, shall we?

10 - 11 Days

It’s been 11 days since this country elected its first Black president. Since then, we have seen announcements of who is going to sit on President-elect Obama’s cabinet, speculation on who is not, stories of meetings and outright power plays being made…we have also heard an insane amount about the puppy that was promised to the Obama girls.

Through all of this is still the phenomenal feeling that in less than 8 weeks, we will swear in a president who is the epitome of change. This election was fought hard for, and there was a lot of passion involved. I’ve seen personally folks getting involved, including myself, that put their hearts and souls on the line. It is my sincere hope that it won’t end. Our country deserves more…it deserves that we use all of that passion to turn it into what we know it can be. All of the hate and ignorance that showed it’s ugly face…we need to ensure that a clear message is sent that there is no longer a place for it. The only way to do that is by creating, and sustaining, a united front.

9 - Godfather

Oh, there is a Godfather marathon on tonight on AMC…I need to hurry and finish this so I can enjoy.

No on has swagga like Michael Corleone…

video credit: originally uploaded to YouTube on May 6, 2008 by BunkerFox

8 - Good TV

So I’m hooked on Trueblood on HBO…I was seriously thinking of shutting down my cable (you know, recession) but then I got hooked on this damn show and now I have to make a decision! Why are all the best shows on cable!? This one is about vampires, in modern day times, and I tell you what…the plot is fantastic!

But I’m conflicted…am I supposed to be this attracted to Lafayette?

video credit: originally uploaded to YouTube on October 6, 2008 by NafterLife

7 - Katt Williams

According to a story on BET.com, Katt Williams was taken to a mental hospital after visiting an attorney with claims that the police were “attempting to violate his civil rights.” Later, the attorney said that Katt was “disoriented” and his family arrived and tried to take him to a mental institution for an evaluation. But it took an order by a judge to get him there.

When I read this story, I think of his children. I know he has adopted kids…7 out of 8 of his kids are adopted. And I also know that Katt was scheduled to give his last stand-up concert on December 31st with Steve Harvey in Detroit. For someone to give up their career, when there is so much ahead, he almost has to realize that it is weighing on him and doing him damage, don’t you think? Maybe it is taking time from his children, maybe he sees himself being more help from the sidelines…whatever it is, I hope that he finds peace.

Update: Katt’s publicist has released a statement…thank you Lady Di!

Following an arduous 300 shows and an 18-month touring schedule that left him incredibly fatigued, Katt felt compelled to be with his family in an effort to deal with his stress. While doing so, he is under a doctor’s care.

As this is a private and personal matter, we hope the media will respect his family’s request for privacy.

Yvette Shearer
Shearer Public Relations

6 - I Could Look At This All Day

5 - Crown Royal…On Ice (for the Grown and Sexy)

video credit: originally uploaded to YouTube on April 15, 2008 by totalpkge16

4 - The Wal-Mart Greeter

I got this through e-mail…

A very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into Wal-Mart with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.

The Wal-Mart Greeter said pleasantly, “Good morning, and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?”

The woman stopped yelling long enough to say, “Hell no they ain’t! The oldest one’s 9 and the other one’s 7. Why the hell would you think they’re twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?”

“I’m neither blind nor stupid, Ma’am,” replied the greeter. “I just couldn’t believe someone would sleep with you twice. Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.”

3 - ???’s

I was reading on Essence.comthat you can insert your birth control pills in your va-jay-jay to decrease the side effects (nausea, vertigo, headaches, etc.)…have you ever heard of such a thing?

Do you really care if Michelle Obama’s mother stays in the White House to help look after the girls? I say she’s needed, so it’s alright with me…people need to get a grip.

If you had a choice to be with anyone in the world you wanted to be with, who would you choose? I’m sorry Jada, but I’d snatch Will’s ass in a heartbeat! 

Are you having political withdrawal symptoms now that the election is over? I felt a little out of sorts a couple of days after…but there is still so much to do. So I’m cool.

2 - Some Personal Shit

So I turned 37 on Thursday…and I am going through some changes, which are good changes. I am open to whatever they are, because I know that they are meant for good. There are some things that I can no longer ignore; some things that I know that I need to correct. We’ll get into them more in depth later, but I just wanted to say that happiness is a choice, and I choose it. Thanks to all of you who sent Birthday wishes (and Coop, thanks for the card - I loved it!)…I hope that Malcolm and Regina enjoyed their days as much as I did!

1 - Incognito

I’ll be sporadic for the next few weeks…I have an awards banquet to attend for work tomorrow, then I’m prepping for a training class so my visits here will be short and sweet.

Take care everyone!

Given that a couple of us (that I know) have recently celebrated birthdays, this post is timely (Happy Birthday, Ms. Regina!!!).

So the year is 1971…the year of The Temptations…

video credit: originally uploaded to YouTube on July 6, 2008 by hogansheroes58

And Marvin…

video credit: originally uploaded to YouTube on September 6, 2007 by zurg222

And Gladys…

video credit: originally uploaded to YouTube on February 16, 2008 by Largo3point0

Ahh…that is sweet!

So I woke up this morning to the first day of my 37th year of living. I was planning this long ass post of reflection and what I’ve learned, and then what I have to look forward to…but to hell with that for now.

It’s my birthday!!!

I had my favorite martini, and my favorite meal, and my favorite slice of cheesecake…and I wore a smile all day because I know that there is love around me and in me. Oh, I could go on and on about the things that I need to change, fix, update, re-do, organize, de-clutter, ponder, arrange, grasp, juxtapose, wonder about, forget, regret, yearn for, miss, hate, lust after, clean up, open, close, answer, and face…but today I choose to be grateful for just being…me.

Peace…

Good evening, everyone…I have so many thoughts in my mind this evening. But they are all convoluted so they wouldn’t make much sense to anyone.

I’ve read a lot about this whole Julia Hudson thing and it has really sat on my spirit because something just doesn’t seem right about it. I left a comment on the write up that WAOD did (I directed you all over there in yesterday’s post)…it said:

I look at this woman and see someone who is loving the attention. Posing in pictures, labeling herself as “the prettiest one” now that her brother is gone (doesn’t that statement seem a bit callous and dismissive of someone that you supposedly love?), and smiling in all the above pics that you posted has me wrestling with thoughts that I probably shouldn’t have.

I will pass no judgement on this woman, because I don’t know her, and I don’t know how she feels…but I will say this: every one does grieve differently and if this is how she gets through, so be it. But if I lost my mother and my brother and my son in the same day, in the manner that she lost hers…posing for and smiling in pics is the last thing I would be doing (even if Stevie Wonder, Prince, and Jill Scott all showed up at my house and gave a live concert in the backyard)…

But even after that comment, I am still wrestling with this young lady and the image that she is presenting the world in the wake of losing her mother, brother, and son. There is a stirring in my soul that speaks that something is not right with this whole situation. And when it all boils down, a child is gone because of some stupid adult bullshit. Maybe that is why it bothers me so much…why the baby?

Then I was thinking about women and their self-esteem. How do they learn it? Where does it come from? I had the blessing of having very strong women in my life who constantly displayed to me strength and endurance and independence…I have fashioned myself in their likeness. I admit that I sometimes go to the extreme on these things…is that just as bad as not having these characteristics? I have driven men away with my hardness, and my fierce independence…but my argument has always been that they weren’t meant to be here anyway. Maybe that is just how I justified my actions…who knows. I know that I have a lot of work left to do on myself in order to be the person I am destined to be…and I realize that it is a lifelong process…nothing will be figured out until it is ready to be figured out.

Then, I got to thinking about my past relationships (it’s a cycle). And I look at those and see the glaring mistakes that I made, but also realize that I got a lesson from each of them. I have learned never to give myself so totally to someone who I know is not 100% there for me; and I’ve learned that love can come in many forms; and I’ve learned that sometimes you have to decide what you stand for and what you will and will not take; and I’ve learned that love lives through the hardest times; and I’ve learned the difference between love and lust; and I’ve learned that love always feels good. But most importantly, I’ve learned that no one can love you if you don’t love yourself. If you don’t love yourself, you end up making dumb ass mistakes and dumb ass choices that will haunt you the rest of your life.

Happy Monday, y’all! Thanks to everyone who left me a “feel better” message…I do feel better!

There is magic in this music…can you feel it?

video credit: originally uploaded to YouTube on January 10, 2008 by LOVESOMEGLADYS

Seems like I missed some good news tidbits not posting the 10Spot on Saturday…like the dumbass football player that posted a racial slur against President-elect Obama on his Facebook account and lost him his position on the Texas Longhorns football team…or the GOP sending lawyers up to recover the clothes it purchased for Governor Palin to wear on the campaign trail (she’s sorting through them)…

There also seems to be an uproar over whether or not Beyonce’ attended the funeral for Jennifer Hudson’s family…but more interesting is what is going on with Jen’s sister and why is she posting pics of herself online? There’s an interesting write-up over at WAOD…

Ms. Regina tagged me with a Real Mom’s meme…Ms. Regina, I promise to get to it this week!

Well, that’s all for today…I will see y’all tomorrow!

Alright…my mind hurts. And I’m sick…so there will be no 10Spot this week (sorry). Lucky for me, I got tagged by a couple of my folks so I’m just going to post those in place of the weekly…

First up…My Favorite Movies A - Z (from IW)…

A - American History X/Ali
B - Bad Boys
C - Color Purple, The/City of God/Cabaret
D - Devil In A Blue Dress
E - Eve’s Bayou
F - Forrest Gump
G - Godfather I/Godfather II
H - Higher Learning
I - I Am Legend/In The Heat of the Night
J - Juice
K - Kill Bill I & II
L - Lion King, The
M - Malcolm X/Memoirs of a Geisha
N - New Jack City
O - Officer & A Gentleman, An
P - Postman Always Rings Twice, The
Q - Queen of the Damned
R - Rocky III
S - Sparkle/Soldier’s Story, A
T - Tsotsi
U - Usual Suspects, The
V - Vacation
W - Which Way Is Up?
X - xXx State of the Union
Y - Yours, Mine, & Ours
Z - Zebrahead

Next…Secrets of My Past (from Iriegal)…uh oh…

Here are the rules:

1. Link to the person who tagged you.
2. Post the rules on your blog.
3. Write six random things about yourself.
4. Tag people at the end of your post and link to them.
5. Let each person know they’ve been tagged and leave a comment on their blog.
6. Let the tagger know when your entry is up.

Here goes:

1. Yeah, I used to smoke weed…I was going through a phase. I can say I did it and moved on…
2. I’ve been celibate for exactly 2 years…
3. I had a one night stand with this dude who I knew nothing about…it was not worth my time and when he called again, I never answered the phone. 
4. I have never had a physical fight in my life.
5. I used to hate my name…I used to want to change my name to “Monica” when I was younger because I didn’t know anyone else named “Marva”…now, I wouldn’t have it any other way…
6. I’m anal about a lot of things…I brush my teeth twice a day, I have to balance my checkbook every night, and clean my desk at work before leaving…things have to be a certain way in order for me to function…

OK, that’s it…everyone enjoy your Saturday and The10Spot will be back in full effect next week!

I feel like I’ve been on the longest roller-coaster ride of my life…I can only imagine what President-elect Obama and Soon-To-Be First Lady Michelle feel like (damn I liked typing that!).

I consider myself a writer, so I should be able to put into words how I felt when that image scrolled across my screen announcing that That One had won the election…but I can’t. I don’t think I ever will be able to describe my emotions. But this song instantly started playing in my head…

OK…I like the pictures on this one, but it cuts off at the end…

The Wiz - A Brand New Day
video credit: originally uploaded to YouTube on August 29, 2008 by hitsville4ever

Here’s the full song:

video credit: originally uploaded to YouTube on April 27, 2008 by thewizboy

Oh, it has been a long road…filled with emotion, passion, tears, hopes, dreams…but it is culminated into a beautiful realization of everything that you fight for, can be achieved.

I lift my glass to the next First Family of the United States…

picture courtesy of Essence.com

Beautiful!

Peace and blessings to all…